Riya Agnihotri, Writing and Information on the latest in child development, education, spiritual parenting, Teen parenting, home education, teaching, writing for children. » Blog

Beethoven Was Beaten. Torture, Turmoil and – Talent?

Riya Agnihotri — Sat, 01 May 2010 15:41:51 +0000

Neighbours of the Beethovens…recall seeing a small boy ‘standing in front of the clavier and weeping.’ He was so short he had to climb a footstall to use the keys. If he hesitated his father beat him. When he was allowed off, it was only to have a violin thrust in to his hands, or a musical theory drummed in to his head. There were a few days when he was not flogged, or locked up in the cellar. Johann also deprived him of sleep, waking him at midnight for more hours of practice.

- Edmund Morris, Beethoven, 2005

So there we have it- another (albeit unfortunate) example of a musical great being ‘created’. I have not brought this to your attention in order to advocate such a horrific way to bring up children in order to ensure a charmed existence. I have illustrated this story in order to highlight that genius is not something that is unattainable and unachievable. These individuals who have such world class talent had in some way, the background that developed this talent.

Again – just to clarify – not everyone can achieve everything. But if we apply ourselves and decide to gravitate towards greatness in our own lives, and also try to impart to our children that regular sustained activity and practice can result in enhanced skills: then we would all feel more fulfilled in our own lives!

By Riya Agnihotri

www.averagetoexceptional.com

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www.maiyaonline.com

The Process That Created Mozart

Riya Agnihotri — Thu, 29 Apr 2010 22:16:44 +0000

Mozart had an extraordinary upbringing, and his remarkable talent that wowed the world so early on in life – was as a result of a ‘process’, rather than his musical ability being a god given gift.

Mozart was immersed in music from the time of conception! His father was an outstanding and obsessively ambitious Austrian composer, musician and teacher. His name was Leopold Mozart.

Leopold Mozart sought fame and acclaim and wished to make a mark on music that he himself had been unable to do. Thus he directed all of his energies on his children. His daughter became an accomplished pianist under her father’s expert instruction. However Wolfgang Mozart received all of the Leopold Mozart’s attention. His father left his own career to direct all of his energies in to ‘making’ the ‘genius’ that we are so familiar with today.

So there we have it. Wolfgang’s early life was a concoction of the finest ingredients of world class instruction, bundles of encouragement and perhaps the most important ingredient of all: constant sustained practice!

One of the most important elements that one must add to any super-success story is the levels of motivation displayed by the child. For anybody to achieve (adults or children) there must also be an intense will to learn and acquire world class ability.

David Shenk makes the following statement about talent:

‘Deliberate practice requires a mindset of never, ever, being satisfied with your current ability. It requires constant self critique, a pathological restlessness, a passion to aim consistently just beyond one’s capability so that daily disappointment and failure is actually desired and a never ending resolve to dust oneself off and try again and again’ (David Shenk; Icon Books 2010; p57)

Daniel Coyle simply calls the same thing…IGNITION!

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The Brontes Were Not ‘Gifted’!

Riya Agnihotri — Wed, 28 Apr 2010 22:23:22 +0000

So you think that The Brontes, Beethoven and Mozart were genius’s? You will be forgiven for thinking that these people all had a ‘natural’ god given talent.

But as I have repeated (a little too much –sorry); genius is not and cannot be wholly natural. Therefore the phenomenal ability of these world renowned artists was down to something other than their ‘lucky’ genes.

It is hard to get your head around such ideas – but the sooner you do, the more that you can do for yourself and for your children in terms of acquiring skills and talent.

So let’s begin by taking a look at the lives of The Brontes. Daniel Coyle refers to these siblings to make his point about the necessity of deep, sustained practice in order to bring about ‘supernatural seeming talent.’

As we are all aware some classic literature was produced by the Brontes: Jayne Eyre, Wuthering Heights, Agnes Grey, The Tenant of Wildfell Hall – amongst other literary greats. The myth that the Brontes were endowed with a divine gift of unsurpassed creativity and genius, was mostly perpetuated by Elizabeth Gaskell in her 1857 biography – The Life of Charlotte Bronte. Many subsequent biographies were written, but they all tended to fall in line with the Gaskell’s earlier assertions.

However Oxford Historian – Juliet Barker, disagreed vehemently with Gaskell’s analysis. See her website: http://julietbarker.co.uk/books/brontes.html.

According to Barker the Brontes were not ‘natural’ born writers and novelists. ‘Gasp.’ I’ll let that sink in. In fact their first little books were ‘cute’ – Barker uses the word ‘amateurish’.

According to this Oxford historian the Brontes showed no signs of genius at all. Barker continues to say that the writing in these books was ‘slapdash’, their spelling was ‘appalling’ and apparently they made very little use of any punctuation!

So where did all of this talent come from? As Coyle describes; it was through deep sustained practice over a number of years -that this supposed genius emerged. Natural – no. Cultivated? Most definitely!

By Riya Agnihotri

www.averagetoexceptional.blogspot.com

http://twitter.com/riyaagnihotri

www.maiyaonline.com

‘It’s Not That I’m So Smart, It’s Just That I Stay With Problems Longer.’ Einstein.

Riya Agnihotri — Tue, 27 Apr 2010 21:46:13 +0000

Children fail. Time and time again. They ‘fail’ to impress, they ‘fail’ at maths tests. Some children are brushed aside and are mercilessly labelled by teachers - to fail at life.

FAILURE: Let your top teeth dig in to your bottom lip – hard. Notice the way your facial features scrunch up as you imagine the word – this physical reaction happens even before you start to say it. It’s perceived to be a bad word. A bad, bad word. It’s a word that strikes fear in to people.

Schools need to take heed and listen to the advice that millions of people follow. They need to prioritise in education and get back to basics. They need to listen to philosophers and influential thinkers of our time that repeat almost incessantly: ‘Failure should be your best friend… Without failure there can be NO success… It is only through repeated knock backs can one attain greatness…” And let’s face it – greatness is something that most of us try to aspire to in some way or another.

But schools and parents don’t. Unsuspecting children are drawn in to a prevalent culture where there is a fear of failing and it is for this reason that many never even try to move beyond what is safe. Safe from who? Safe from a teacher’s disapproval? Safe from parental frowns and safe from negative societal reactions? Who knows where these complex emotions ultimately stem from. But these attitudes are often with us for life unless we try to make a deliberate mental and emotional shift.

But the scientific community has all but eradicated the traditional notions that people ‘either have it – or they don’t.’ According to scientific studies talent is and can be created. Genius is available for anybody who manages to bring about the right conditions to succeed. But these conditions are external. Your familial situation and upbringing, language acquisition, musical exposure, resources, wealth and mentoring, amongst other things, are largely responsible for what people for centuries have called ‘innate’ ability.

The next post will discuss; The Bronte Sisters, Mozart and Beethoven.

Taken from my blog: http://www.averagetoexceptional.blogspot.com

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Babies Don’t Get Bored!

Riya Agnihotri — Tue, 27 Apr 2010 10:20:33 +0000

Before my baby gets bored, I must write this post. It is slightly tongue in cheek – however the lesson is very valuable. I read these tips on a website this morning and will definitely use them. You can find the link to the original source below.

According to child expert Magda Gerber, babies do not naturally become bored (I however would beg to differ). Allowing babies time to explore their feet, stare at a lampshade or gaze for hours at a toy green elephant (as my little cherub does) is good for them.

However, for the parent, letting a child occupy themselves can often feel uncomfortable. Carers often feel the need to stimulate their children as much as possible. But letting a baby ‘be’, to discover themselves, can, in the long term, aid concentration skills. Babies require uninterrupted time with their own thoughts and it is in these seemingly quiet periods, that subtle developmental shifts can take place.

Don’t interrupt your baby as he gazes out of the window – wait until his eyes are drawn away and his concentration naturally dissipates - to change his nappy – or feed him. As parents when we decide to interrupt our babies, we shorten their concentration spans. We, in a sense, are not giving our child the respect they deserve. It’s annoying for us to be interrupted by a door bell, phone, or useless chatter at work when we are trying to concentrate. Babies (probably) feel the same way. They just don’t have the same articulation as us adults!

And the most valuable tip? Children and babies love everyday tasks- especially if they are fully present and in the moment. For example. It isn’t always necessary to give the child a toy duck in the bath. Let them splash around in the water and experience the simplicity and the joy of water on their skin (very spiritual I know – I’ll light some scented candles a little later!). They don’t need a toy as you change their nappy. Let them find ways to occupy themselves. If you start as you mean to go on, you will find that your child is more likely to have a longer concentration span – this will help them enormously at school where there will be an emphasis in developing concentration skills further.

So the moral of the story is: Don’t feel guilty… rejoice in your baby gazing and cooing contentedly while you get on with the housework or reading a magazine. Both you and your baby need ‘me’ time. You can be safe in the knowledge that you are actually ‘building’ their concentration muscle rather than neglecting them. If baby play bores you hairless, then this is invaluable advice.

To get some further parenting tips and advice on child development please visit:

http://www.janetlansbury.com/2010/04/baby-interrupted-7-ways-to-build-your-childs-focus-and-attention-span/

By Riya Agnihotri

www.averagetoexceptional.com

www.maiyaonline.com

http://twitter.com/riyaagnihotri

The Talent Code: You Tube Clip

Riya Agnihotri — Mon, 26 Apr 2010 20:16:48 +0000

As mentioned in my last post (http://www.riyaagnihotri.com/category/genius/page/2/): Daniel Coyle wrote The Talent Code in 2009. The work is a must read for anybody who wishes to delve deeper in to the world of scientific discovery and uncover insights in to how they can assist their children, at whatever age – to succeed.

If the right factors come together for your child, this may very well lead to greatness. If you like what you read, you must try to impart the findings to your child, as soon as you feel they are able to understand the implications of such groundbreaking discoveries.

As we all know, children, and especially teenagers, can be extremely self defeatist and suffer from a lack of self esteem. In my ten years of experience as a sixth form lecturer – I am acutely aware that students are unwilling to make mistakes. The culture in our schools and the ethos of education does not tolerate failure. It is because of this culture that pupils and students do not push themselves. They fear failure. They don’t want to look stupid. Many low achievers feel they are ‘naturally’ not up to the mark – so they may as well not bother to push themselves.

The view that ’nature’ creates genius is simply a myth. Knowledge of this may assist in leading the way to greater success for many more children. In my opinion the education system needs to embrace these ideas and make success education an integral part of the school curriculum. I am sure such information would go a lot further in blostering school success rates than the pointless PSHE or other such ‘extra’ curricular activities.

Taken from my blog: www.averagetoexceptional.blogspot.com

From Average to Exceptional

Riya Agnihotri — Sun, 25 Apr 2010 21:57:46 +0000

Imagine this: Your child’s classmate is apparently a genius. Little plain looking Robbie was able to read before your child was potty trained. He is able to articulate himself to a degree that is seemingly impossible for a five year old. The teachers have labelled him a genius. He has what people frequently refer to as; inborn talent, innate ability or genius. These words are frequently banded about for children, or indeed adults, who display inordinate amounts of skill.

If you are like most parents there is a touch of ‘jealousy’. You may not wish to admit it. You may brush away the feeling when confronted with such a spectacle.

Many parents have a strong desire for their child to excel. When we witness such talent in others it makes us feel uncomfortable – Daniel Coyle (The author of The Talent Code: 2009) in his unique style calls this feeling the HSE. The Holy Shit Effect. It’s the feeling you get when you see people just like us getting ahead, displaying amazing feats of genius. It’s a wholly different feeling to seeing talented individuals on the television. Like Pavarotti or Beckham bending the ball.

But one thing that we console ourselves with is that such talent is only in the domain of a few lucky people. We sigh as we natter to other parents; “there are very few Mozart’s or Einstein’s – little Robbie got lucky!”

But you are wrong. Such a deterministic way of thinking is breaking down. Paradigms in the scientific community are blurring with new ground breaking research in to the field of genetics. This amazing research is challenging age old notions that there are only a chosen few on god’s earth that reach the pinnacle of success

How would you feel if you knew for certain that Michael Jackson, Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods DON’T have natural inborn talent?

Think about how you feel about this: Child prodigies are NOT born with special genes that give rise to phenomenal skill in chess or maths or literature or music. “Impossible!” I can hear you mutter. “How can that be?”

But it can be. And it is.

The ideas that I will be discussing on this blog are not as transient or as formless as ‘The Secret’ (or better known as The Laws of Attraction). There is a very exact science to the development of genius or talent.

It is something that schools don’t teach, it is something that teachers rarely know about or care about.

If you want to help your child or teenager or indeed yourself to succeed, these are ideas that you must accept and learn. They will revolutionise your parenting – you will see your child as capable of more things that you ever imagined possible. These are facts that everybody should take their time to digest and promote.

For other realted posts please see my other blog: www.averagetoexceptional.blogspot.com

Spiritual Parenting: Some Reflections

Riya Agnihotri — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 19:53:36 +0000

I think I am on a bit of a roll here because, all of a sudden, I feel I have found teachings on parenting that resonate with my deepening feelings of spirituality. In all honesty I was going to overlook Chopra and his Spiritual Guide to Parenting. I felt that people would misunderstand my frequent reference to Chopra as reflective of Hindu Philospohy. But he is a superstar in his own right; and revered globally!

However Chopra transcends religion in his writing. I say this with conviction – these posts are applicable to parents all over the world and to those that belong to any faith.

Rhonda Byrne’s best seller: The Secret teaches us (in a very simplistic and effective way) about the law of attraction in our lives, with the premise that the world has a divine creator. This is what Chopra does and thus his work is open to any person who believes in some kind of ‘higher’ force or ‘spiritual being’. In fact, it could be argued, that his philospohical musings can be enjoyed by those with no such hankerings. Obviously there was a plethora of other books on this topic that people may find just as useful.

The other real issue that I had before embarking on these animated discussions about Spiritual Parenting; was the fact that ‘spirituality’ on any level, especially in our Western World, is frequesntly shunned. We live in a secular world where discussions about faith, spirit, God or divinity are treated with abhorrence or indeed it is perceived to be in the domain of those with serious psychological disorders!

In fact religiosity after 9/11 is synonymous with terrorism. I hope those of you who believe that there might be something to an alternative (and firmly from a non- religious) perspective on parenting than the conventional Super Nanny dialogues that we are so used to; will find my musings on these topics interesting.

Secret Slobbery

Riya Agnihotri — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 09:18:08 +0000

Is this really necessary?

As I write this I can imagine that you are ensconced in your black leather reclining sofa, watching Saloni Ka Safar, sipping on a hot cup of garam masala chai that you especially prepared for yourself? You have finished all the housework and dusted every nook and cranny of your house. The laundry is drying and even the windows gleam.

You thought that you would rest for a while before collecting your children and bringing them home to eat their freshly prepared meal around your hundred seated, teak dining table especially imported from India. The flowers that you bought this morning in-between the chores, rustle gently in front of the window.

No? You’re not? You are actually trying to surf the net with your children trying to murder each other and your husband complaining loudly that he has no more boxers shorts? At the same time you are scanning the room mentally torturing yourself for not cleaning up earlier. Suddenly your child whines that he is hungry and you realise you hadn’t even thought of dinner and your fat bum hasn’t been to the gym in weeks. The chaos in your house renders it barely habitable and you wonder why you live in such a mess.

I know I do and so do millions of others! But people like my next door neighbour are the ‘cleanest’ people on earth and they have a baby. Their cars are washed and waxed weekly, I can hear the hoover most days and they leave the lights on in their kitchen at night so everybody in our cul–de- sac can peer in. I always look in enviously and with astonishment, not a stain in sight and definitely NO CLUTTER!

I then proceed to jump down my husband’s throat at the bloody mess in the house. It’s not all my responsibility.

But you know we all try to put on our best most uber- capable flawless front to the world, while inside we are dealing with a myriad of problems ranging from dealing with draining family members to keeping the house in some kind of order.

Apparently 99 per cent of us feel some kind of hideous pressure to perform and admit to occasionally feeling out of control from life’s daily chores.

We tend to feel bad about our secret messes, like lots of hair and dust occupying corners of laminate or wood flooring and a colony of spiders in a gap between two cupboards. I know when someone arrives unannounced, I go in to a state of panic about the toilet and hair I can see. I pretend to go for a wee and frantically clean the downstairs loo, and sneakily shuffle around the house picking up the hair entwined with age old dust and bits of chocolate buttons. Uhgh!

Just as Chunni’s and heavy gold jewellery constrained Asian women in the sixties and seventies, (before a large proportion of their children embraced the modern western attire of the Brits) so clutter-free minimalism constrains the Asian babe of the 21st Century.

We are still behind the ‘white natives’ because minimalism to us constitutes using gold plated tissue boxes and flashing lights around the pictures of our Guru’s, demi-gods or temples. But we are fast catching up with the craze for pristine white tiles and carpets to match. I have been to houses where bathroom surfaces are cleaner than their owners, because the poor clutter-free loons can’t ‘bear’ toiletries messing everything up.

Some Asians are keeping cleaners and not all of them are imported brides from ‘back home.’ A couple of mums I know, sheepishly admit to this luxury – but they wouldn’t tell their own mums for fear of a clip around the ear.

So you could be a lawyer with two cheeky children, a full-time job and a four bedroom house, but you will probably feel greater pressure to clean your home at weekends than spend quality time on yourself and the kids.

All Desi Mums, whether in a job or at home can feel additional pressure from various areas of their lives and often these are the direct result of community and societal pressures of the ‘role’ of the woman after marriage. This can prevent a woman taking tentative steps in order to ease her work load by getting a cleaner, nanny or au pair.

Such opinions are deeply ingrained and transcend generational barriers. So really what we perceive to be vastly improved circumstances for Asian women in this country, is really just a masque for belief systems that are still there and expressed subversively in religious and ritualistic practices.

Other exposure, like Asian television and radio, all portray certain stereotypes and images of the ideal female (perhaps unintentionally) and her role in the family. There are families in the United Kingdom that still stringently believe and except the chronic subjugation of women and this will take generations to weaken.
So what can we do to help ourselves and not be so obsessed by futile domestic practices?

• Start by accepting that a messy home is fibrillating with possibilities. It tells people (even if they drop cutting one-liners) that here lives someone with many more interesting things to be doing than putting away socks in alphabetical order of coutry of origin or ironing knickers (people do iron knickers!).

• A house in which everything is ruthlessly tidied away is the lifeless abode of an owner with no soul and harbouring a personality disorder.

• Clutter brings serendipitous finds: Divali cards for a Granny’s that live in the Homeland. Your child’s first scribbling, money, tickets to theatre shows that you loved, former fat pictures hidden under pile of books and many more illustrious discoveries.

• Hire a cleaner, nanny or Au Pair. All three if you can and don’t feel guilty. Our mothers barelycoped, had hard lives and no time. Such things are no longer luxuries and should be regarded as a necessity for any busy mother (If you work and can afford to or give your self a break and save money for this luxury ruthlessly).
* You don’t have to tell anyone; they can believe that you are superwoman and scoff in envy when they deliberately turn up unannounced.

• Cleaners can be relatively inexpensive these days and cost the equivalent of buying lunch for a week – what would you rather do make your own lunch or have someone come in once a week and sort out your home for you? You can even loiter with the cleaner if you ‘don’t trust’ cleaners – just don’t be tempted to ‘help them’. It will free up lots of time and save oodles of energy (mental and physical) and you could be doing other important things.

• Our friends in India, Pakistan and Bangladesh have ‘home help’ in various forms: gardeners, cleaners, launderers, chefs and the list goes on so; ‘do it yourself and save money’ is NOT a Desi thing!

• Clinical Psychologist, Linda Blair, author of Straight Talking (Piatikus Books, £10.99) believes the, ‘more successful and ambitious the woman, the more likely she is to have an area of chaos in her life because she need a challenge’.

So there you have it, a disorderly house, emotional love life and a pathologically disordered diary is the sign of a woman who rejects a regimented lifestyle and embraces spontaneity. Thus your personal chaotic space can also be the symbol of your personal success and us Asians love a success story!

On a more positive note:

Stay clean, stay sane and go for self acceptance rather than self improvement. The latter is what causes emotional instability and a crazed perspective on life. Now I must put away these boxes before my mum visits….

By Riya Agnihotri

Demeanour for the Ultimate Diva

Riya Agnihotri — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 02:04:22 +0000

Forget clothes, forget hair, forget facial hair …(okay maybe I am taking that a tad too far!) but seriously have you , as a stylish young Asian woman , ever given thought to what comes out of your Dior pout? Have you ever contemplated the complexities of your charismatic character and how it appears to the outside world?

This is often something that is overlooked in favour of various studies that have been conducted in favour of changing ones appearance in order to win that dream job, bag that dream man or make your business more successful.

But ultimately beauty in all it’s glorious forms also comes in the guise of self-esteem, self assurance including lots of study -as well practice in front of a non-judgemental mirror! The American industry also heavily promotes the cultivation of personality as well as the more the superficial elements of beauty- like boobs, hair and skin. The Self- Help industry is massive in America and growing steadily in the United Kingdom.

The American’s see mental clarity and super confidence as the first rung on the ladder of success and paramount in accompanying our physical presence in to the world. As an example Bipasha Basu isn’t as symmetrical as Aishwarya Rai Bachan and she doesn’t have the milky hues of Katrina Kaif but the woman oozes sex appeal, positively gleams with glamour and has had the honour of being compared to the iconic Sophia Lauren.
Bipasha Basu has been quoted saying that the secret ingredient in a truly glamourous woman is in the mind. She is aware of her own power and harnesses her body to project a certain image: confidence in herself is what attracts other people to her. Body language, is subtle but immensely influential when trying to win over others.

It has been 11 years since Tom Peters, the American Management guru, published a manifesto entitled “The Brand Called You”. Peters declared that; “In this age of the individual, you have to be your own brand…that’s true for anyone who’s interested in what it takes to stand out and prosper in the new world of work.”

Subconsciously we are all used to celebrities, polititcians and world leaders branding themselves. Shilpa Shetty’s stint in the Brother House allowed her to brand herself in a big way. Her sophistication and grace won the hearts of the nation and it allowed her to capitalise on what appeared to be ‘Eastern Values’.

Before her live trauma on screen, Shilpa was an average actress. Her carefully constructed beauty and amazing body was an important part of the Shetty brand; but it was her deliberate control in the face of adversity and crisp use of her femininity that illuminated Shilpa Shetty and elevated her status in Bollywood and abroad. Only a supremely intelligent woman can use these attributes but still allow her ‘true self’ to come through. Shilpa was careful (or perhaps it was natural and thus effortless) to retain a genuineness about herself: Doing this negated any possible projection of arrogance and allowed the nation to warm to her. Shilpa Shetty is an authentic fake. Master the art and you too could reach new heights.

Perhaps Shilpa Shetty could counsel Naomi Campbell in the art of glamour and muliebrity. Naomi Campbell may be beautiful but the woman carries little class. Arrogance and aggressiveness is unnatural in whatever form it appears, and such behaviour should be anathema for women. These traits although undesirable in men appear a lot more ‘natural’ and are generally considered alpha male attributes. There are other more productive and effective ways in which to make yourself heard. There is nothing quite like control and effeminacy to compliment your physical appearance.

Personal branding supremo Louise Mowbray, of Mowbray By Design, one of the UK’s only Personal Branding Services admits that the British don’t really want to admit they are working on themselves. This attitude is very different to those New York explains Mowbray: “They happily introduce you as their personal branding consultant.” Mowbray charges about £400 an hour and sixty per cent of her clients can be anyone from bankers to plastic surgeons to someone who owns a series of health clubs. The other forty per cent are those in public eye.

Working on yourself and making clear who you are and the image you want to portray will help you stand out in a company or amongst potential clients and customers as well as investors. If you are working in a company with 8,000 others you can ‘stand out’ by being ‘unique’. Find a subtle way of championing a particular cause or develop a particular area of expertise that you will be valued for. Work on your presentation skills and demeanor.

Try to keep up-to-date with what is happening in the world. Take an active interest in literature, art and politics: It will give you something to talk about socially. Read books by successful people and allow them to ‘mentor’ you. I started with “How To Win Friends And Influence People” by the infamous Dale Carnegie. A brilliant self help company called Nightingale Conant have succeeded in changing the lives of hundreds of thousands of people. Pick and choose the advice that rings true for you.

Ninety nine per cent of people roll along in their lives without any thought to improving how they appear to others or even giving a thought to what their values are and ‘who’ they really want to be.

Image is not just about taking time out with a personal shopper at Selfridges and learning how to apply make-up professionally. It goes a lot deeper.

Finally in answer to the all too familiar question that is often asked is: “How can we create an attractive, magnetic air without impinging upon our true nature and personality?

Many people feel aggrieved that they should have to change; they say it feel as if they are being dishonest with themselves and feel like impostors in their own skin. Surely we should be proud of who we are and feel unafraid of to express ourselves as best we know how? To try to create a new personality can often be regarded as a preposterous suggestion and an added pressure in an already superficial society.

An answer to this conundrum may well be: You might as well not bother to brush your teeth, style your hair or even bother with clothes – why not really go back to your core and the realities of your naked truth?! Developing your demeanour is all about dressing your soul and deviating from the perceived norms of society – taking that time out to nourish how you come across is an all important task, not to be taken lightly in this current climate of competition; whichever field you happen to be in.